Reflection

I’m feeling a little reflective today…not like sunshine reflective – though I am so pale that when I am in the sun you have to use that little eclipse box you made in grade school. You know…looking directly at me will burn your retinas kind of reflective.

But that isn’t the point. The point is that lately I have been doing more thinking than doing. Perhaps it has something to do with the fact that I have been home more often because of the kidney infection and now the upper respiratory infection (that I got from going to the dr for the kidney infection). I think it has more to do with the fact that I quit watching TV.

We cancelled our Direct TV because there is no way we can moderate our TV watching. I would sit in front of it to eat lunch or supper and then an hour later I would still be there looking for something else to watch. Plus I had so many shows saved that in order to clear out the queue I would have to spend all weekend watching stuff. I finally decided I didn’t like the shows that much. I decided that if I really wanted to see a show I would have to go to the gym to see it. And a gym membership is cheaper each month than satellite TV so it just made sense.

A benefit to not having TV is that we were able to get rid of the big TV in the front room. It was HUGE!!! Before we got rid of the tv it always looked too crowded in the living room. We had the couch, 2 recliners, end tables, a big kitty condo, a coffee table and a sideboard. We moved the tv and stand out, re-arranged the furniture, and moved the kitty condo and the sideboard to the small dining room. It is so big in there now it echoes. LOL. I also cleaned out the little hallway and window seat that connects the small dining room with the living room so that helped too. This weekend I am tackling the formal dining room and the sewing room in addition to just puttering around.

While I am doing all this moving, cleaning and straightening I am also getting rid of a lot of stuff - stuff that should have gone to Goodwill or Salvation Army a long time ago. It needs to just leave my house now. I don’t need it, I don’t use it, and it’s gotta go. That is, everything with the exception of the various collections I have. The teacups, fine china and crystal stay. As do my grandmothers glass and porcelain items. Anything that has personal value…oh, and I have to keep that little wreath that I got from a friend of a friend of a friend…lol. Ok, now I know why my house is full.

BUT…doing all of this gives me lots of time to think (see I came back to the original thought). I normally get this way during spring and fall when I do most of my gardening. It is relaxing and my hands know what to do so it allows my mind to wander. Plus it is a beginning and an end as far as seasons go and that makes me reflective as well. But for the past few weekends I have been doing all this organizing and cleaning and straightening and because of that, a lot of thinking.

At the end of the weekends I sit in my room (used to be the guest bedroom) with the kitties and think about the week ahead. I plan out the lunches, the outfits, the gym time, and the general schedule. And it is at this time that I start feeling the most content.

I think it has a lot to do with the feeling that, finally, I am in control of my life. I know I’m not, but I do have control over the little things. I think most of it is because my job and commute are reasonable now. Sure we have our busy times, but my job allows for a life. And because I have the time now to take care of things I don’t feel so frazzled or out of control.

So, in addition to my commute, my bosses, and my actual job, that is another benefit of working at a good company – time to think. And when my brain quits hurting from all the thinking, I may write again.